The Different Kinds of Tired
(And How to Move Forward)

Have you found yourself thinking, “I’m more tired than I’ve ever been before?”  You’re not alone. There are different kinds of tired… and not all of them are fixed by sleep. Sometimes you’re tired because you truly need rest. You’ve been running hard, working long, traveling, serving, and doing what responsible adults do…showing up and carrying the weight. A good nap, an early bedtime, or a quiet Saturday morning can genuinely make you feel human again.

But other times, you sleep for eight hours and wake up still tired.

That’s when we need to recognize something important:

Not all tiredness is physical.

Sometimes tiredness is emotional. Mental. Spiritual. Relational. Even decision-based. And if we don’t understand what kind of tired we’re experiencing, we’ll keep trying to fix it the wrong way. We’ll keep trying to solve soul-level exhaustion with surface-level solutions… and wondering why nothing changes. So let’s name it. Because naming it is often the first step toward healing.

 

 Physically Tired: When Your Body Is Depleted

 

Physical tiredness is the most recognizable kind of tired. It’s the tired you feel in your shoulders. Your lower back. Your head. Your eyes. Your legs. Your bones. It’s that heavy, sluggish feeling that shows up after too many days of “go, go, go” without a real pause. Being physically tired is often a sign of:

• Too little sleep
• Too much travel
• Poor nutrition (or skipped meals)
• Dehydration
• Hormonal shifts
• Being “on” constantly
• Stress that never turns off

And here’s the thing: your body keeps score. You can be spiritually strong and emotionally resilient and still be physically depleted. Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is not “push through.” Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is rest.

Sometimes, you have to choose an act of kindness for your own self…for your own body.

This week I’m at a conference and normally during the entire mealtimes and in between I am networking, or frankly doing whatever I can to help others. I use these times to connect and pour into newer leaders, up and coming people that might need someone like me to assist them. But I came into this conference still recovering from the flu.  I’m more tired than usual. So when the first day’s schedule gave us an hour and a half lunch break, I ate for 20 minutes with leaders and then went to my room to sleep for the rest of the time until our next meeting. I chose me for once. And it was the right decision. It was good to have an hour nap each day before I went back to my afternoon meetings. Did I have people say, “I looked for you but couldn’t find you…”? Yes. Did I have people ask if they could meet up with me at lunch? Yes. Did I feel badly for not doing it this time? No.

How to move forward when you’re physically tired:

Choose one act of kindness for your body.

• Drink water (This week I stopped drinking soda, realizing the terrible way it’s making me feel.)
• Take a power nap
• Eat something real – substantial food, clean food
• Take a short walk
• Stretch your shoulders
• Go to bed early (I’ve been doing that all week too, even at a conference!)
• Cancel something non-essential
• Say no without guilt!

Small changes don’t seem dramatic, but they are powerful over time.

 

 Mentally Tired: When Your Mind Won’t Stop

 

Being mentally tired is when your body may be sitting down, but your brain is sprinting. I am so mentally tired after work. Even when I schedule a work call for on my way home I usually give 15 minutes to decompress and listen to music. (My commute is an hour and 15 minute to an hour and a half.) Sometimes if I am really mentally tired I don’t take calls at all on the way home.(You might wonder why I’m taking calls on the way home at all and the answer to this is, to get them over with so I don’t have to do any of them when I get home. When I home I want to really be home.)

When you are mentally tired, your thoughts are running scenarios. You’re planning. replaying conversations. anticipating problems. preparing for what might go wrong. and carrying responsibility that never quite leaves your head. You may feel like you “can’t shut it off.”

Mental tiredness often comes from:

• Information overload
• Overthinking
• Constant problem-solving
• Over-stimulation
• Never-ending responsibility
• Too many open loops

Even when life is calm, mental tired can keep you braced—because your mind learned that being “ready” is how you stay safe.

How to move forward:

Close one open loop. Not all of them. Just one.

• Make the call
• Send the email
• Schedule the appointment
• Write it down so you don’t have to hold it in your head

And if you can’t close it today? Write it down anyway. Give your brain permission to set it down. Sometimes peace begins with a list.

 

Emotionally Tired: When You’ve Carried Too Much for Too Long

 

Emotional tiredness is the kind you feel after being strong in silence. It’s the exhaustion that comes after:

• Supporting people through crisis
• Managing conflict
• Dealing with disappointment
• Processing heartbreak
• Being the “stable one”
• Holding everyone else together

Emotional tiredness doesn’t always look dramatic. In fact, it often looks like someone who is “fine.” Someone who keeps showing up, keeps producing, keeps serving, keeps smiling. But inside, you feel thin.You feel worn. Your head feels “kind of funny.” (If you know, you know. Sometimes you just feel foggy.) Emotionally tired people often say things like:

• “I don’t know why I’m crying.”
• “I’m not even sad, I’m just… done.”
• “I have nothing left to give.”
• “Everything feels like too much.”

Being emotionally tired doesn’t mean that you’re weak. It means you’re human.

How to move forward:

Give yourself permission to feel without fixing.

You don’t always need an immediate solution. Sometimes you need space to acknowledge what’s real. Try asking yourself:

• What emotion have I been swallowing?
• What grief have I not let myself name?
• What am I carrying that isn’t mine to carry?

Even saying the truth out loud is a kind of release.

 

Spiritually Tired: When Your Soul Feels Dry

 

Spiritual tiredness is often misunderstood. It doesn’t always mean sin. It doesn’t always mean you’re “backslidden.” It doesn’t always mean you’ve lost faith. Sometimes it simply means your soul is thirsty. You love God. You believe truth. But you feel disconnected. Dry. Numb. Empty. This kind of tired can happen when:

• Ministry demands outpace your personal devotion
• You’re always pouring out
• You haven’t received in a while
• Pain and disappointment have piled up
• You’ve been faithful for years with little rest

Spiritual tiredness isn’t always loud. Sometimes it looks like this:

You still go to church.
You still lead.
You still pray.
But your spirit feels like it needs oxygen.

You need to know that God is not disappointed in you for needing renewal.
He is not offended by your exhaustion.
He invites you closer, not farther.

Jesus said: “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28) Notice what He didn’t say: “Come to Me when you’ve got it together.” He said, “Come tired.”

How to move forward:

Ask God for daily bread, not a five-year plan. Sometimes the most powerful prayer isn’t long. Sometimes it’s simply:

“Lord, I need You.”
“Jesus, restore me.”
“Holy Spirit, breathe on me again.”

 

Decision Tired: When Everything Requires Something From You

 

There’s a kind of tired that comes from decision fatigue. It’s the exhaustion of constantly answering questions:

• What’s for dinner?
• Where should we go out to eat?
• What should I wear?
• What’s next?
• How do I handle this?
• What do I say?
• Should I respond?
• How do I fix it?
• What will happen if I don’t?

Decision tired happens when you are:

• Responsible for too many outcomes
• The one everyone depends on
• Managing staff, family, ministry, schedules, and crises
• Carrying financial or leadership pressure

Decision tired can make you feel:

• Foggy
• Irritable
• Unmotivated
• Emotionally flat
• Overwhelmed by simple tasks

It’s not laziness. It’s overload.

How to move forward:

Simplify one thing.

• Choose the same breakfast for three days
• Wear the same style “uniform” of outfits (my signature is black slacks and a jacket.)
• Delegate one task
• Delay one non-urgent decision
• Say, “I’m not deciding that today.”

You are allowed to protect your mind. And last but not least…

 

A Simple Way to Move Forward When You’re Not Sure What You Need

 

If you don’t know what kind of tired you’re feeling, try this simple question:

“What part of me is most depleted right now?”

• Body?
• Mind?
• Emotions?
• Spirit?

Then respond with the simplest form of care.

You don’t have to overhaul your whole life tonight. You just need the next wise step.

Being tired doesn’t mean you’re failing.
It may mean you’ve been faithful.

It may mean you’ve been carrying weight for too long. It may mean it’s time to stop shaming yourself and start shepherding yourself.

Here are three small ways to move forward today:

 

Name it

 

Stop calling it “I’m fine” and call it what it is.

“I’m physically tired.”
“I’m emotionally spent.”
“I’m spiritually dry.”
“I’m decision tired.”

Naming it brings clarity. Clarity brings power.

 

Release one thing

 

One burden. One expectation. One unnecessary pressure.

Ask yourself:

“What can I let go of today that I was never meant to carry alone?”

 

Receive one thing

 

Rest is not only about stopping—it’s about receiving.

• Receive quiet
• Receive help
• Receive nourishment
• Receive peace
• Receive grace
• Receive God’s presence

You don’t have to earn rest.

If you’re tired today, I just want you to know that you are not behind, weak or failing. You are simply at a moment where your body and soul are asking for care. And God is kind. He does not stand over you with disappointment. He stands beside you with rest.

Rest is God-ordained wisdom, obedience and how we keep going.