God has been calling me to a place of depending on Him rather than some of the things and people I depend on so much. I’m not saying God has called me to be totally independent of others, or resistant to receiving help. I know as human beings we are wired for connection. What I am saying is that way too often, Christians are more dependent on other people, and our worldly comforts instead of God. And, I have observed that many people including myself are often obsessed with attaining a pain-free life.
God never promised us a pain-free life. In fact, without ups and downs, life would be meaningless. Some of my least favorite places on earth are the flat places with no hills and valleys. Height and depth give fuller significance to life although we often resist them, and sometimes curse the darkness. It is the varying dimensions that tend to make the difference in our lives, and not the days that appear to pass by without consequence. I have an understanding at this point in my life that most of the triumphs and accomplishments in my life have come through wrestling in the darkness. Without that, my life would be rather nondescript.
Last week, God challenged me to take the next difficulty in my life that hadn’t arrived yet and when it comes, to keep it to myself. He said, “Pray about it for a month before you utter a word of it to anybody.” My first thought was, “This will be hell.”
Doing this is a major shift for me. I am used to catching up with my closest friends at least weekly, and having a constant text-stream. I couldn’t imagine not sharing something important that was happening. Honestly, I love hearing my friends say, “Ugh, that’s unfair.” And, “What?! I’m so sorry you have to deal with this…” And, “You deserve more…” Nonetheless, God gave me this challenge. I sensed He was prompting me to see the result of what would happen if I fully relied on Him alone and didn’t lean into anyone else to try to figure something out, manage it, solve it, or even pray with me about it.
C.S. Lewis says:
“The thing is to rely on God. The time will come when you will regard all this misery as a small price to pay for having been brought to that dependence. Meanwhile, the trouble is that relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing has yet been done.”
This is the thing about trusting in God. We are faced with the necessity to do so all over again, every day — like it’s a brand new thing we are taking on.
Here are three things I’ve learned that help with this.
Dependence on God must be a first-response.
My firs instinct when something bad happens is to text my best friend and say, “You won’t believe what just happened…” I want her immediate validation that what I’m going through is not good, possibly unfair, that I probably don’t deserve it. And I want her to let me know when we can talk about it. (And — I do the same thing with her regarding anything in her life.)
But I’ve had to realize I can do the SAME EXACT THING with the Lord. I can stop right then and there and have a conversation with the Lord. So why do I so often not do that first?
Dependence on God must be sustained.
After my initial call out to God, I need to remind myself to relentlessly converse with Him.
Donald Miller once said:
“If we knew how much God loved us and was for us, we’d talk to Him all day long.”
This is what the Bible is referring to when it says to pray without ceasing.(I Thessalonians 5:17) It’s not about always praying out loud or in the same fashion we do in church. It’s about a conversation with God rolling over in our minds all day long. My challenge is to keep that conversation percolating in my mind constantly instead of running to my friends for comfort. (Again, there’s that craving to be out of pain all the time.)
Dependence on God is a relentless call to converse with Him all of my waking hours.
Dependence on God requires a change of cravings.
Lysa TerKeurst says:
“God never intended for us to crave anything more than we crave Him.”
I learned as a Mom that when I invited my kids to the dinner table, if they weren’t hungry it was probably because they were doing too much snacking. I have had to ask myself, “What worldly comforts am I snacking on that I need to let go of?” I have learned that for my cravings to change, I need to have a healthy diet of the right things. Psalm 34:8 says, “Taste and see that the Lord is good.” If we have been snacking on the world, we aren’t hungry for God. I we don’t have a steady diet of God and the things of God, we have not even tasted what it is like to fully rely on Him. We’ll never know how good it is until we do it. If we don’t try to be fully dependent on Him, we have no idea what it’s like and have nothing to compare it to. So many people who resist God or don’t rely on God haven’t even fully tried Him.
So, I’m trying this challenge, leaning so hard on God, and I know a depth and height I’ve never experienced in my walk is coming.
this Really speaks to me Deanna …
I will take this dare for 30 days…
you already know I really on people to much and I know I need to rely on God More!
I am ready….
The Lord in my prayer time yesterday brought the song back to me I’m coming back to the heart of worship and it’s all about you Jesus….
A tribe is good, friend’s are good, Leaders are good but I can’t rely on people more then God and this is something I am wanting and willing to change ….
I want to Put Jesus first and everything else behind me …
I am so proud of you for taking this challenge!! Love you!
Thank you for this insite into myself and my child of snacking on the world!
We’ve recently recalibrated our hearts and minds to God through a Christian family camp after the long school year. The idols of my heart were revealed to me and I could clearly see the idols of my family too.
Originally I had planned for just me and my child to go to camp to bond, but three days before my trip I was reading the Word and it was like my whole mind was strongly illuminated!!!! “We’re better together.” And then I remembered a dream journal entry from a month ago, “a spiritual retreat for the three of us.” I invited my mom and then my flesh cried and doubted, but still went through with the descision!
For about 12-14 hours on the ride there and during the camp ..the thoughts coming againt my mind were … “if would be better if she didn’t come to camp, she’ll get in the way of bonding…” then a couple hours in, the thouhts broke off my mind! 🙌🏼
The attack is simple divide and seperate! I had to let go and still letting go of judgment. I had Gods leading through His Word being read allowed to us the camp!!! ( my son repeated the same scripture alloweed in the car on the way back! Not knowing that it was confirmation for me!) I have victory at home too! 😍
The not so great part, that same enemy came for my child to seprate from me. Since the teenage years are here, eveyone views it as acemptable but I know it was spiritual too.
All that to say the hunger for God will demand changes in our every day lives. These words came out of my mouth before the trip, “We can’t have disciple and fun at the same time.
Meaning we can’t have a great spiritual life and then watch tv or zone out of video games for way more hours than our time with God and expect those things not to impact us emotionally and spiritually.
How we spend our time is very revealing. I think gorging on the world applies more than snacking, but change is coming and is in site!!!!!😍🙌🏼
I feel safe to share here,
thank you.
You ARE safe here. <3 Thank you for sharing your story. Much love!!
I’m definitely going to try this for 30 days and hopefully it will last my lifetime!!
The first thing I want to do when things happen, is to tell someone, for validation, sympathy, prayer, comfort, compassion. Then I pray about it.
I’m going to work hard at only talking to God about my issues and not sharing with anyone else.
This will definitely be a challenge, but a very important, necessary one. Thanks Deanna.
Let me know how it goes, Jean! Much love to you.
I too need to reach for God first. It’s too easy to reach out to my circle first, then reach out for God. I am wanting Him first in everything. I am asking God to remind me every time I look to others, might not like how often He has to remind me! So I am with you in this challenge!
I am so glad we’re doing this challenge together, Camilla! Much love to you!
This is so timely, Deanna – God knew. Your wonderful “challenge” is the perfect adjunct toward the direction God has been pushing me for quite a while, with seriously increased pushing lately… I’m praying for His help in achieving this challenge and making it a life change even after the 30 days. That it will not be like a fast, that the moment it is over, we go back to feasting. No, praying that this will establish Him as my first go-to and greatest confidante – after all, He already knows! Thank you for your obedience!
Last Tuesday sparing details here…. Something unexpected and terrible happened. A difficult conversation. I immediately wanted to text the “ can you believe this” to a friend. But the Holy Spirit pushed me back in my seat and said don’t. Through this I sensed the Lord say rely on me. And through this difficult thing I heard God say …. You have a part in this and I realized I had to make changes.
Deanna thank you, I accept the challenge 💚
I’m taking the challenge. This spoke to my soul.