Everyone wants something.

I’ve noticed the majority of people don’t realize the tricks to the trade of getting what they want. There are people who, when instructed on what to do to get help, will still insist on doing things their own way. This is one of the biggest ways that people stand in the way of their own success.

There is one very simple thing you can do to greatly increase your odds of getting someone to help you with something you want. If you want to receive someone’s attention, and ultimately their favor — communicate with them in the manner that they best receive requests. There are no guarantees, but success is much more likely.

A previous leader I worked with loved texts. If I wanted their attention and response, I could text immediately and they promptly answered me. I hate texts. If someone texts me, I groan. I answer in as few words as possible.But if I’m dealing with someone who prefers texts and I’m the one who needs something, I know I need to make a personal adjustment. Because I’m the one asking.

I am easy to reach through e-mails, Messenger and social media.These would be my number one methods of communication where I really flow in helping people. I prefer typing on a keyboard, not tapping on a phone.

I realize everyone doesn’t operate that way. And that’s why if I need something I don’t expect them to meet me there. I find out their sweet spot and approach them in the method that  most entreats them. Because I’m the one asking — not them.

If they aren’t a phone person and prefer face to face meeting, I set one up at their convenience. I also go to them, I don’t expect them to come to me, because I’m the one asking for a favor. 
If they love texts, I text them.
If they prefer e-mails, I do that.
If they want a phone call, I approach them that way.
If I’m not sure — I ask them!

There’s a well known author I have received personal advice from over the years. He let me know he was happy to help me, but requested I keep my e-mails to two to three sentences. He told me the doesn’t have time to read anything longer than that, from anyone. I keep my questions to two or three sentences and he gets back to me promptly. I have found that the key to so much is respecting the person whose help you’re asking.

The past year, I have been getting endorsers for my book that is releasing in April of 2025. All of the endorsers prefer something different. Some of them wanted more lead time to read the book. Some wanted a digital copy, others insisted on a hard copy. There were those that didn’t want to communicate with me personally at all and insisted that I go through their assistant for everything. You know what? None of that mattered to me. Whatever they asked for, I gladly gave it to them. I was the one that needed their help and I didn’t care if they asked me to stand on my head and sing the Star Spangled Banner to get it, I was going to do whatever they asked.

You see, the responsibility doesn’t fall upon the one who’s giving help, it falls upon the one asking for the help. So many don’t understand this principle.And they repeatedly get frustrated and wonder why help is elusive.

Will this approach require you to shift gears in how you communicate when you need something? Yes. But the point is, if it’s you that needs something, it’s you that has to do the shifting.

Will you always get what you want? No. Nobody does. And quite frankly nobody should. Who gets their own way all the time? But meeting others in the way they prefer gives you a lot better chance of gaining assistance.

Try it, and let me know how it works for you.